Sold

And right now I'm gutted.

It only took two weeks to get an offer on our house, it has gone unconditional and we settle on June 6th. And we have nowhere to go.

Well, not exactly nowhere. We have my parents, and I love them for that. Alot. It's just that our life is here - school, kindy, piano, guitar, soccer, netball, friends, work, church (sundays, Bishop interviews, faith in god, activities)..... the commute is going to be painful.

We are moving next weekend, putting everything in storage and taking the bare minimum to Mum and Dad's. I haven't even begun packing. I don't want to. I really really like my house and where we live, and the only reason we put our house on the market is because we found a house that was perfect for our growing family. Unfortunately it turned out to be a leaky house and we simply did not have that much money to fix it. Instead of taking our house off the market till we found something else, we left it on there knowing that as a cash buyer we would be in a better position to buy when another house came along. Well we've tried to buy another 3 houses and being a cash buyer has meant nothing. One was leaky (again!) and the other two were auctions but the owners wanted more money than we felt they were worth. Suck! I really didn't think it would be this hard to buy a house.

So what do we do now? As I said our life is here, so it makes sense to find a rental here. Well, that's easier said than done too. There is such demand for housing in Hamilton, whether its to buy or to rent that things go pretty quick. And we've been holding out for one of those auctions that we haven't been able to commit to a rental, but now we are of two minds about buying this property thinking it's not really 'the one'. And now there is bugger all out there available to rent at the time we have to move. Which means two moves. One out of here, and the other when something comes available. Joyous. Not.

It is all so incredibly frustrating and unknowing and unsettling and stressful! My poor children have had some very grumpy parents of late because we just don't know where we are going to live.We've looked in the ward boundary, we've looked out of the ward boundary and we just don't know where the Lord wants us to be. We've prayed, we've fasted, we've prayed, we've taken it to the temple, we've prayed and I've cried. This really really really sucks.

I can't even call the power/phone companies etc cause I don't know if I'm cancelling their services, or moving them. I have 12 days. Which isn't the 6th of June but it's long weekend and is the best time to move. The 6th is a Friday and Nate would have to take a day or two off work if we did it then. With only him working, we need all the money he can make.

Speaking of work, I haven't decided when I will go back to working. I've started weaning my baby, he takes two bottles a day now, but still has maybe four feeds from me. Weaning is painful, and organising his bottles and his solids now just adds to the pressure I'm feeling. He's 6 months now and a solid little boy, so he needs the extra nourishment. Otherwise I'd forget it all and just leave him on the breast - so much easier.

I almost feel like I'm paralyzed. I just don't know what to do. I have a whole house to pack and I just won't start. I just don't want to move.